Whatever happened to not feeling guilty about going out?
I’m in Salvador at the moment. Brazil’s Salvador. North East. I’m staying in the old town, wonderfully coupled with cobble streets, cute signs for restaurants and bars, and a African-European culture to it. It’s Saturday night. I feel the need to go out, because of what my mind is telling me. It’s possibly going to be a big night. As I’m writing these very words its 11.43pm. The more the night drifts on,(and in Brasil, the nights start late), the more I feel guilty and the quest to go out. My predicament is a bit complicated as the travellers I know here have went to another suburb, to a samba club, which sounds very interesting and something I would love. However, I don’t fancy drinking that much. This is a contrast to how I use to feel, fearing not missing out on something. Yet, my body for this time around is getting a little more matured, if you can call that at 26 years of age, not that keen on an appearance. However, there is still EVERY possibility after I write and draft this article, I’ll be out somewhere.
Whatever happened to the cosy nights in, with your mind at ease and not caring less on what’s going on outside? I got reminded of this, by waiting for some food, metres away from my stay here at Hostel Cobreu. The lovely elderly Brazilian couple, taking my food order down and brief, broken conversation of mine in Portuguese. I decide not to sit and wait. The lady says ‘dez minutos’, i trust her judgement, smiling happily. I wait around, admiring their business, a very homely local feel to their restaurant. They have Jesus Christ and other Catholic religious ornaments behind their desk, with candles lit in between. There are 50 style pictures around the walls, with old and recent photos of what I was assuming families and memories here. The lights are on but not bright and fluorescent, the ones that shine but do not reach every corner of the room, allowing for shadows of objects and wall corners to appear.
I gotta say I love this. It reminds me of the nights I have had at my Grandparents house on my mother’s side. We would watch the football results come in, and either watches a movie on the premier channels, a old comedy program such as Only Fools and Horses, comfy by the chair, the dog sleeping lazily, happy to eat comfort food and wait until we were naturally tired so drifting a sleep would be a pleasure. Lovely times. No pressure and it really felt as though nothing else mattered on them nights. I would look forward to a Sunday morning Full English Breakfast followed by the results from the Football and highlights shown on the TV, followed by the anticipation of more football, some Playstation time, Family time and a Sunday dinner.
But whatever happened to them moments? I feel it would be more and more impossible for this to come about. The introduction of seeing what people are doing by a glance through your social networking accounts, almost gives us this feeling we are missing out on other peoples lives. We have the ability to see what is going on with pictures and statuses from our friends, wherever they are. We get text messages and invites to places that we may want to go, almost making us feel we HAVE to do something instead of enjoying a bit of down time, whatever the night. People are sleeping less, using the mentality YOLO to give themselves the energy and convincing to do things, sometimes in-excusable things. That’s not the point here. I just feel that we live now in a full, transparent rat race, where cute and cosy nights are becoming harder to fully enjoy. You’ve seen the status of people saying how they are ‘getting old’ by not going out on a Friday night, jealousy of others status of their apparent ‘great’ nights, whilst they are soppily having a cup of tea and hitting the sheets at 9pm. Listen, this isn’t no lifestyle for me, but that doesn’t mean I think its right to feel guilty about having a night in. Sometimes we need that relax. I’ve mentioned in previous articles before, we work too much in this life, we sleep less, we want to do everything. It’s actually a problem for me, or at least has been.
I think, we need to switch our phones off, forget about the notifications, the outside world, and just enjoy what conversations your having or the movie you are watching once in a while. I’m not saying be a mute or become obsessed by relying on technology for entertainment, but just to switch off the curiosity of what’s going on with others and relax yourself and enjoying the easy pleasures without any guilt.